Hahah, I never update these these stupid journals anymore.

So anyway, I've been thinking a lot about things as of late, mostly about being happier and making a decent living for myself.
Right now, I'm not doing much about reaching my full potential - taking core/useless classes at GRCC and sitting at home most of the time. After being depressed about it but not doing much for a couple years, I'm finally ready to finally DO something about it. I'm currently applying to a bunch of jobs, because I can't keep living like I am in this current financial situation. I mean, fuck. I'd rather push carts at Meijer than live like this.
However, I have a personal dilemma as far as my future in art and school goes. I wanted to go to Kendall, but now after secretly experiencing things, I'm not sure if they have what I need. Plus, the whole pretentiousness factor is really turning me off. It kinda disappoints me too - I've always wanted to go since I was about 12 years old. What I considered a place that I would finally be accepted for who I am is now filled with hypocritical people who stare at me when I go down the hallway.
So where do I go from here? GRCC's art classes don't offer me much either, but I'm not sure if I'm willing to go out of state just to go to art school. My major at GRCC right now is Visual Communications, which covers art, graphic design, animation, video editing and web design. I'm not sure if that's a vague enough major to be a professional freelance artist with. (Do you even really NEED a degree in art to do so?)
I'm tired of feeling like a failure. I want to actually do something with my life instead of living in Rockford with my parents for the rest of my life. I guess that means I'm finally growing up, heheh.

tl;dr - I'm stuck. Halp plz? ;^;